Churchill Family Counseling, LLC Warrenton, MO

I am not actively grieving... My loss happened 10, nearly 11 years ago and while my life was changed forever, my heart was gutted, and my path was hijacked, I a...m no longer in that place actively. Now, please don't confuse my words if you don't fully understand grief. I still miss him. I still love him. I still wish my children could talk to him and hug him. I may not be actively grieving but that does not mean that my loss isn't still with me in one way or another. It means I've worked hard on myself and my journey. It means I've processed my loss both mentally and physically. It means I continue to do hard work in all aspects of my life. What it doesn't mean is that the loss goes away and the pain disappears. It does not mean he is forgotten. It does not mean I don't have moments of sadness or even grief. What they don't tell you about loss is that it is forever. You will shift and you will grow. You will be sad sometimes and extremely happy at other moments. I'd love to tell you there is a timeline for pain and loss but I'd be lying. I may not be actively grieving but I will forever grieve him. My loss didn't stop me from living but only because I made time to feel my pain and I made deliberate choices day after day to take steps forward. Some days I leaped and some days I crawled but all these days later....I'm still going. Don't think the day will come where you will be fixed after loss, because it does not exist. You will be morphed. You will be informed. You will be deeper and richer in all the ways that truly matter. Michelle #griefprocess #grief #griefjourney

Are you thriving or just surviving? The COVID pandemic has created a concurrent crisis around mental health. We all need to be taking care of each other, but th...at includes ourselves. This is especially true for healthcare workers. This site from the Colorado Healthcare Ethics Resource Group offers information and resources to help address the anxiety and stress that can, if left unaddressed, deteriorate into crisis. https://cohcwcovidsupport.org/ See more

If you're struggling, in crisis, or just surviving, reach out for help. THRIVE!

It's right there waiting for you to return

This is so powerful!

Being Suicidal / Suicidal Ideation This is an excellent, yet sensitive question. It is all very complex and there are no simple answers. Having thoughts of sui...cide and being suicidal are two different things. When an individual has suicidal ideation they are usually ambivalent about dying. There are alternating thoughts about wanting to live and wanting to die. In most cases, a suicidal thought lasts minutes or hours. This is why being able to ask these questions and engage in conversation is critical. Whether it be through text or a call or physically staying with someone while they work through these thoughts can be life saving. Someone who is suicidal and/or shows signs, risk behaviors, or just expresses having a plan to die, should be diagnosed and treated professionally. This is referred to as a crisis situation. Unfortunately, when someone is determined to take there life, they generally show no signs. They may appear to be their everyday self and give no warning at all. So what can you do as a parent? Be proactive. Learn as much as you can about mental health (especially depression/anxiety). Learn about the risk factors and warning signs. Be observant of you child’s behaviors, social media, schoolwork & friendships. It is crucial to have as open and honest a relationship as possible with your child. As parents, especially those of kids already suffering from a mental health issue, we have to pay more attention to things we probably wouldn’t normally. I don’t say this to scare parents; i say it because it’s a fact. Teen suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death in the U.S.. We need to be aware. We need not to be brainwashed by stigma, but rather stop it by acknowledging what it truly is. Stigma veils the lived experience and covers it up with we shouldn’t talk about it or we can’t talk about it. We need to realize how serious this has become and start being pro active about making a difference. I’m not a Psychologist, a Therapist or a Doctor. I’m just a father on a crusade to fill the void of silence and help prevent suicide. Suicide prevention is everyone’s business See more

Sis, the inability to receive support from others is a trauma response. Your I don’t need anyone, I’ll just do it all myself conditioning is a survival tacti...c. You needed it to shield your tender heart from abuse, neglect, betrayal, and disappointment from those who could not or would not be there for you. From the parent who was absent by choice or by the circumstance of working three jobs to feed and house you. From the lovers who offered sexual intimacy but no offered no safe haven that honored your heart. From the friendships that always took more than they gave. From all the situations when someone told you we’re in this together then abandoned you, leaving you to pick up the pieces when isht got real, leaving you to handle your part and their part, too. From the lies. The betrayals. You learned along the way that you just couldn’t really trust people. Or that you could trust people, but only up to a certain point. Ultra-independence is a *trust issue.* You learned: if I don’t put myself in a situation where I rely on someone, I won’t have to be disappointed when they don’t show up for me, or when they drop the ball... because they will always drop the ball sooner or later, right? You may even have been intentionally taught this protection strategy by generations of hurt women who came before you. #generationaltrauma #ancestraltrauma Ultra-independence is a preemptive strike against heartbreak. So, you don’t trust anyone. And you don’t trust yourself, either, to choose people. To trust is to hope, to trust is vulnerability. Never again, you vowed. But no matter how you dress it up and display it proudly to make it seem like this level of independence is what you always wanted to be, in truth it’s your wounded, scarred, broken heart behind a protective brick wall. Impenetrable. Nothing gets in. No hurt gets in. But no love gets in either. Fortresses and armor are for those in battle, or who believe the battle is coming. It’s trauma response. The good news is trauma that is acknowledged is trauma that can be healed. You are worthy of having support. You are worthy of having true partnership. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of having your heart held. You are worthy to be adored. You are worthy to be cherished. You are worthy to have someone say, You rest. I got this. And actually deliver on that promise. You are worthy to receive. You are worthy to receive. You are worthy to receive. You are worthy. Worthy, sis. You are worthy. You don’t have to earn it. You don’t have to prove it. You don’t have to bargain for it. You don’t have to beg for it. You are worthy. Worthy. Simply because you exist. I love you. ~J. . Credit: Original image by Rising Woman, reposted from The Womb Sauna. Commentary by moi, Jamila White (FB: http://fo.me/inspiredjamila, IG: @inspired.jamila) Permission to share/repost is gladly granted as long as: 1. It is kept in its original, unedited form; and 2. Full authorship credit is given with my name. A link/tag is appreciated. Thank you!

You are worthy!

You are valuable!

www.HeroicWomenWarriors.com

Morning Mantra: "Strength is nothing but pain that's been repaired." We all at certain times in our life feel broken. True strength and beauty is found in picki...ng up the pieces and creating a life more beautiful than ever. Embrace your cracks, they represent your history. They are badges of survival. They are where the light of healing gets in. #BeOkayWithYourCracks #BeHappy #BeHorsey #BeHippie #HorseHippie #MorningMantra #InspirationalQuotes See more

Do not ask your #children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving may seem admirable, but it is the way of foolishness. Help them instead to find the #...wonder and the #marvel of an #ordinary life. Show them the #joy of tasting tomatoes,apples and pears. Show them how to #cry when pets and people die. Show them the infinite pleasure in the #touch of a hand. And make the ordinary come alive for them. The extraordinary will take care of itself. William Martin, The Parent's Tao Te Ching: Ancient Advice for Modern Parents #neurochild #wonder #simple #ordinary #extraordinary

Sometimes all we need are the words to say what we really mean. (Things we could say to our own children, partners, siblings, parents, friends as well!) Have a wonderful week!